Scottsdale Car Service: The Web’s Best Car Jokes

Scottsdale Car Service

This Scottsdale car service company has gone to great lengths scouring the internet for the best car jokes around. We’ve seen the good and the bad (a lot of bad) and these are the best of what we could find. Enjoy!

 
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
Onelinefun.com

 
What do you call a VW bus at the top of a hill? A miracle.
quickfunnyjokes.com

 
What car does a Proctologist drive? A brown Ford Probe.
quickfunnyjokes.com

 
I have a fear of speed bumps.
But I am slowly getting over it.
unijokes.com

 
A motorist runs a red light and is photographed by an automated police camera. In the mail a short time later, he receives a photo of his car committing the infraction and a citation for $60. Instead of paying the fine, the motorist mails the police department a photograph of three 20-dollar bills. Several days later, he gets a letter back from the police department. Inside is a photograph of a pair of handcuffs.
caranddriver.com

 
Someone at the auto repair shop locked the owner’s keys inside his car. While the locksmith was working on the driver’s-side door lock, the anxious owner walked up and tried the passenger’s-side door. It opened.
The locksmith looked up. “Yeah, I already got that one.”
caranddriver.com

 
Eddie was driving down the road and a met a car coming the other way. Although there was room to pass easily, Eddie forced the oncoming car to slow down and wound down his window and shouted ‘Pig’. The other driver looked in his rear view mirror and swore at Eddie. Then his car hit the pig.
guy-sports.com

 
Do you know any funny car jokes? If so, let us know in the comments!

 
 
Images used under creative commons license – commercial use (3/21/2017) dylanlspangler (Flickr)